How to Handle Holiday Stress
& Hear From Listener’s Themselves!
Hi there and welcome back to Loving Later Life! I’ve been in Arizona for the weekend to spend time with my Dad and his wife to be together for his 88th birthday. I remember like it was yesterday throwing him a surprise 50th …38 years ago! So crazy. We had a wonderful relaxing time talking and talking and eating and eating. I feel so grateful at my age to still have both my parents around and available for quality time.
Birthday’s, like holiday time, are milestones marking the passage of time. Sometimes these milestones are joyous and sometimes they can be stressful, painful, difficult and challenging to name a few. Am I right?
I actually had another episode all cued up and ready to go for this week, and I realized I can’t skip over this ‘most wonderful time of the year’ without calling out what so many of us feel, think… and don’t say. So I am sitting here on the airplane in the middle seat, the day before this is to drop, writing down my thoughts to make this episode happen. As soon as I get home around 8pm, I will record, edit, write the shownotes and then I’ll hopefully upload it in time for it to drop tonight at midnight PST. It would be much easier to let the scheduled episode land in your queue, but I’ve gotta follow my gut on this one.
There is also a very special part to this episode because…. some listeners wanted to chime in with their thoughts regarding the last episode, which warned against getting bugs in your eyes. And if you didn’t listen to it yet you must, in order to know what that means!
So yes! You will hear recordings from women sharing their thoughts on how they feel about asking for help. I want to thank you ladies for sharing…and for your help! So be sure to listen all the way through to hear what they have to say!
Not be missed take-ways:
1. Sometimes these milestones are joyous and sometimes they can be stressful, painful, difficult and challenging to name a few.
2. “Compassion is another word for the refusal to suffer for imaginary reasons.” (Martha Beck quoted name I couldn’t get)
3. If we didn’t cause ourselves to suffer unnecessarily, and just accept what is, we can be more compassionate to ourselves and to others.
4. Accept what is and try and find what you can learn from it. As she said, find the light in the darkness…and isn’t that what most of the holiday stories are about?!
5. Focus on what is good. Are you feeling healthy? Maybe your least favorite relative couldn’t come? You got to sleep in? Look for anything that you can feel grateful for.
6. Respect your boundary lines. Ie: If you want to leave early, leave early.
7. What if a family member is as difficult, rude, judgmental, intrusive…pick your dysfunctional irritant…. as you expect? Let’s say they offer up an unwanted opinion. Martha suggests what I think is an amazing response. Start with these 5 words: I respectfully do not care…I respectfully do not care: what you think; if you agree with me etc.
8. Knowing that you can do something yourself is empowering, and builds confidence. AND, when you need the help, ask for it!
9. We believe the stories we tell ourselves, so stay aware and be sure it’s true.
10. There is a liberating freeing element to reaching out for help, and not feel lesser because of it.
And your mission, that I hope you’ll choose to accept…
1. If you are celebrating the holidays with friends and/or family, be conscious of your ‘supposed to’s,’ and try to accept what is.
2. Focus on what is good and find gratitude.
3. Breathe.
Thank you so much for listening! And until the next time, live passionately, vulnerably, and keep loving later life!
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